Searching For Something
by cullen818
Summary: Peter is searching for something, but he doesn't know what. He can't help but notice the lonely brunette who stares at him each night. What does she know? Entry for We Don't Need No Stinkin' Coven Contest. AU/Mature Themes


**WE DON'T NEED NO STINKIN' COVEN! CONTEST**

**- TITLE - **Searching For Something

**- PEN NAME -** Cullen818

**- PAIRING - **Peter/Bella

**- SUMMARY -** Peter finds himself alone and unhappy. He stumbles into a pub in Seattle where he picks up his victims, but he can't help but notice the lonely human who stares at him night after night. He senses something different about her, but what? Why is she drawn to him? AU, rated M for lemon and mature themes.

**- DISCLAIMER -** All characters belong to SM. I only like to play with them.

While this o/s doesn't come off another of my fics, I originally developed this Peter for my Fate/Love/Hope Trilogy and have used him in A Reason to Exist, as well.

Thanks TwiCarol and Jasper's Darlin' Kathy for being my betas.

**PPOV**

Lonely. It sucks to be all alone. It was a true, I was a nomad, and I never really felt the need to be a part of a coven. They didn't work for me. I never really gave it much thought either; not until Charlotte, my wife and mate of many decades, decided it was over. How do you up and leave your mate? I thought that shit was supposed to last an eternity.

In the beginning, I had Jasper, and we formed a bond that would last a lifetime, but ever since he and his coven mysteriously left Forks three years ago, I didn't talk to him that much. I knew he had an incident with a human girl, but he wouldn't tell me why his family had reacted so strongly to that particular slip up. It wasn't as if he killed the girl, just snapped at her. That animal drinking way of life really made no sense to me anyway. We were vampires for fuck's sake, we fed from humans. But, you see, Jasper hooked up with a coven and now he struggled on a daily basis to live that particular coven's way of life. I didn't need that bullshit. Didn't need anyone telling me what to do.

I had lived many happy years with Char. We had a system, a routine that we followed. We were civilized in the way we hunted. We had a life; a good life, or so I thought. Well, I really couldn't dwell on it anymore. I was now a nomad in the truest sense. I went where I wanted to go, and I hunted when I wanted to hunt; the way I wanted to hunt. It was hardly civilized, but it was extremely pleasurable, well at least for me. My victims gained initial pleasure, but that didn't last more than a few minutes.

I had been living this way for a year; roaming the country in search of something. What that something was, I had no idea. I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was missing. Something fundamental and it was probably really obvious, just not to me. That was ironic, since my supposed gift was seeing things that others couldn't. I had a keen sense of perception and could spot situations and circumstances that weren't as clear to another. When helping to create newborns for Maria's armies many years ago, I could also tell which ones were going to have a gift and which ones were rendered useless. Jasper swore I was never wrong, and for that he was very grateful. I missed Jasper, and I wished that he would leave that senseless coven and join me. The fun the two of us could have exploring the world. I knew that wasn't going to happen because he would never leave Alice.

About two weeks ago, I ended up in Seattle. I hadn't been here in years, but I figured with all of the rain it was a perfect place to hang my hat, at least for the time being. Hunting was becoming a sport and that was something Char would definitely frown upon. That was probably why I was doing it. I wanted to go against everything I had ever learned or done with her. It was my way of forgetting who I was.

As soon as I got here, I found this little pub that all of the college kids liked to frequent. I was finding out that these particular college girls were quite eager to go off with a handsome stranger, so they were making my new hobby extremely easy. I had to be careful with the ones I chose. I couldn't draw attention to myself, so I would pick the girl who had come in alone, the one that no one would miss and probably wouldn't go looking for. Seattle had many of these girls. The lonely, seeking attention and companionship.

I strolled in and sat at the bar, ordering my usual bottle of beer. The same beer that I'd eventually end up removing from my system later in the evening, but the beer was necessary. I couldn't exactly sit at a bar and drink nothing. Again, I was trying not to draw attention to myself.

It didn't take long before I made eye contact with the pretty blond sitting across from me. She looked to be no more than twenty. She had an awesome body and a very attractive face. I smiled at her and she looked down at the floor, clearly playing coy. I could work with a submissive type. Just as I was about to walk over to her, I caught the little brunette who had been eyeing me up for a few nights, out of the corner of my eye. _Why was she always staring at me with that all-knowing look? _I had almost approached her the first night I was in here, but something inside of me screamed to stay away from her. She wasn't hard on the eyes, but there was something about her that told me it wasn't a good idea.

She continued to watch me as I approached the blond and turned on my southern charm. It didn't take long before she was grabbing her bag and heading out the door with me.

"My apartment isn't far from here," she smiled.

_Lucky me! _Part of me wanted to scold these girls for making this so easy for me. Didn't their mother's warn them that they weren't supposed to take strangers back to their houses? But, the other part relished in their stupidity._ You get what you deserve._

"Well, then let's go, sugar," I smiled as I threw the cash down on the bar and guided her toward the door. Just as we got to the exit, the little brunette was standing there with a shocked look on her face. I winked at her before heading out, but not before I noticed the prominent blush that spread across her cheeks.

My sexy blond was uneventful and instead of feeling satiated, I felt empty. I would admit that the sex was good, but not mind-blowing. It was never earth shattering. Maybe because I knew how it would end? I was tired of analyzing it. I knew I only had a few more nights left here in Seattle. My recent activities were starting to make the news. They would never find the bodies, but suspicion of a serial killer was a buzz on the campus and that tended to make women a bit skittish when it came to a good looking stranger hanging out in a bar. This had happened in other cities, but my pattern was so random that I couldn't be classified as a serial killer in the eyes of a homicide detective. I left no clues, I didn't always seek college girls, and after a spree like this, I usually headed abroad. I never worried about being caught, how could I? I left behind no DNA, not even a fingerprint, so except for the fact that I could deplete my territory, there really wasn't anything for me to worry about. How could I be exposed when technically vampires didn't exist? I was certain that, even when I sunk my teeth into my prey, they didn't even have a clue as to what I was.

I always waited a few nights to return to the pub after a kill. Usually, I didn't even return to the same place more than twice, but I seemed to have had a fondness for this particular haunt. I wasn't sure why. I walked in and took a seat at the bar. The place was a bit empty tonight, so I was already thinking it wouldn't be a good idea for me to pick anyone up. I liked crowds, so that I could blend in, well as much as a vampire could blend in.

I sat for about forty-five minutes, weighing my options when I decided it wasn't worth the risk tonight. Just as I was about to stand, I sensed her. She was walking toward me, her heart beat was erratic, she was afraid, but she made her way to me anyway. She hesitated before sitting on the stool next to me.

"It usually doesn't take you this long," she muttered so low that if I were human, I might have missed it.

"Excuse me," I said, as I turned and smiled at my little brunette.

"You usually know who you'll be leaving with by now," she said.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said.

"How come you won't choose me?" she asked, and I felt her heart rate increase as her breathing picked up.

"Maybe I prefer blonds," I smiled. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"No." she shook her head. She was prettier than I realized. Her long brown locks cascaded down her back and her eyes were a deep shade of brown; chocolate was the best way to describe them. She continued to stare at me, but I didn't know what she wanted, and that voice inside my head continued to tell me she was trouble.

"I know what you are," she said.

"And what is it you know about me?" I knew I should get up and go, but I was captivated by her. Humans didn't usually speak to me, unless I approached them first.

Just before she answered, she bit her bottom lip. That was kind of hot. "I know you're thirsty," she said. "But, you hide it well."

"Thirsty?" I said. "Interesting choice of words."

She didn't say anything, just continued to stare at me. I had enough games, so I stood up and turned to leave, but she reached for my hand. She was so warm, it momentarily distracted me. I quickly pulled away, not wanting her to notice my frigid body temperature. She didn't seem shocked.

I sat back down_. What did she know?_ Would she really be stupid enough to confront a serial killer, if that was what she thought I was?

"You don't know anything about me," I said. "And, if you were smart, you'd get up and walk out of here and forget you ever saw me."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" she challenged, and I had to smile because I liked a challenge.

"My name is Isabella," she said. "I'm from Forks, a small town in Washington. Have you heard of it?"

"I have," I said, knowing that was one hell of a coincidence.

"Aren't you going to tell me your name?" she asked.

"It's Peter," I said.

She seemed a bit surprised when I told her my name. "Are you from Texas?"

How the fuck did she know that? She wasn't a vampire, so what the fuck was she? "Obviously, you know accents. Mine isn't hard to figure out." I tried to play this as cool as possible.

She laughed. "I was accused of being very unobservant once," she said. "But, since then I've learned how to see what's right in front of me."

"Really?" I said. "And, what's right in front of you?" This girl had a death wish. I knew there was something off about her.

"Your kind is easy to spot," she said. "If you know what you're looking for."

"And what is it that you're looking for?" I said, smirking at her.

"You," she simply said, as she got up and started to walk away.

"Wait," I said. "Where are you going?"

"Home," she said, as she tossed her hair back, allowing me to take in her luscious scent. It was almost as if she did that on purpose.

"I'm not ready for you to leave," I said.

"I think you'll be able to find me," she said. "You could probably just follow my scent."

_Fuck!_

How did she know? Even if she knew the Cullens, how could she know what I was? I dropped the money on the bar and followed her out. I stepped out onto the sidewalk and looked around, but I couldn't see her. I'd have to rely on her scent. She wasn't far.

I turned the corner and saw her walk into a rundown apartment building. I stopped and tried to focus. If I went into that building, I'd have to kill her. But, if I turned around and walked away, she could expose me. I'd have to leave Seattle now, but could I? Could I leave, knowing that she knew my secret? It was true I was a nomad, but I was still obligated to follow Volturi rules. She shouldn't be permitted to live if she knew what I was. I had to be sure before I left. I had to know what she knew.

I entered the quiet, old building and walked to the third story. Her scent was over-powering me as I got closer to her apartment. I took in one deep breath and then swallowed back the venom that was forming in my mouth. My throat was scorching and my body anticipated this kill. I had to keep myself in check. I wouldn't kill this girl if she didn't know what I was. I still had a bad vibe, something I couldn't shake, but I didn't think I was supposed to kill this human. My gift was screaming at me to listen.

I knocked gently on the door, not wanting to alert her neighbors that she had a guest.

"Come in," she said.

I pushed open the door and saw her leaning against the counter that separated the living area from the kitchen. The apartment was tiny, but cozy. It smelled of her, actually reeked of her, but I liked the way it smelled. It wasn't her blood that was appealing to me, it was her. _What the fuck?_

No human had ever tempted me, other than to drain them. Although my throat was on fire, I didn't have the natural urge to drink. _I knew this bitch was trouble._

"I'm here," I said. "Now stop playing games and tell me what you think it is you know." She seemed awfully calm for a girl who claimed to know what I was. If she thought I was a killer, shouldn't she have been more afraid? _Did she have some sort of death wish?_

"Would you like to sit down?" she asked, as she plopped down on the sofa.

I walked over and sat next to her. I purposely made sure I got as close to her as I could. She didn't seem uncomfortable. _Maybe this chick was nuts?_

"You're extremely attractive," she said as she swallowed hard. "Too beautiful to be human. That's what tipped me off."

"You do know that you sound deranged, right?"

"You don't have to hide from me, Peter," she said. "I know what you are."

"And you're not afraid?" I asked.

"No," she said, and she seemed so certain. "Your skin is so perfect and your body is almost like marble. It was your strong jaw line that confirmed it for me. No mortal could be so god-like."

I laughed.

"And then when I saw you leave with the first girl," she said. "I knew what you were doing. She was so attracted to you; it intrigued me how easily you got your prey to go with you."

_Oh God… she did know._

"I came back the next night, but you didn't show for a few more evenings. You did it again with the next girl and then the same thing a few nights later."

"Why haven't you exposed me?" I calmly asked, as the venom began to fill my mouth again.

"Who would believe me?" she asked.

She had a point.

"I'm curious though," she said. "We made eye contact several times, but you never picked me. Why?"

_Was she serious?_ She was asking why I didn't choose to feed off her? "You're not my type."

"Oh," she said as she looked down, clearly disappointed.

I reached for the side of her neck and pulled her closer to me. She gasped at my speed. "Do you want to be my type, sugar?"

"I-I don't know," she said. Now she was afraid.

"What's the matter? You don't like being this close to me?" She tried to pull away from me. "Now, now," I said. "If you really know what I am, do you think you'll be able to get away from me?"

She shook her head, and then I saw the tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

I leaned in closer to her face and stared into her eyes. "What am I?" I had to hear her say it.

"I already told you that I knew," she said. She was intoxicated by my smell. _Stupid human, they were all alike._

I moved closer to her ear as I leaned in and nipped her lobe. "I want to hear you say it."

She didn't answer me.

I ran my tongue along her jaw line, and she tasted divine. I was testing my own control.

Her breath caught in her throat.

"You started this," I whispered against her neck. I slipped my hand up to my eye and removed my disguise, quickly doing the same to the other. If she knew my secret, I wouldn't need the contacts.

"Tell me what I am," I demanded without looking up at her.

"You're a vampire," she cried. "A human drinking vampire."

I grabbed her hair and pulled her head back, as I ran my tongue along her vein. "Is this what you were seeking?"

She took a deep breath and then started to shake uncontrollably. "Do it," she managed to breathe out. "Please…"

I nipped at the skin just over her vein. Her blood was warm and inviting. All I had to do was sink my teeth into her soft, supple skin. It wouldn't take much and it would be over, before she even had time to process it. But, something wasn't right. Why was she offering herself to me? Why was it so important that I kill her? No, there was more to this story and I intended to find out what it was. I pulled away from her neck, keeping her hair fisted in my hand and forcing her to look into my red eyes.

"Oh," she cried, as she tried to look away. I held her head in place, locking my gaze on her.

"Look at me," I said. "You invited me here. Why?"

"I wanted you to bite me," she admitted. "I wanted you to end it for me."

"You wanted to die?" That didn't make any sense to me.

She started to sob as she collapsed against my chest. "I hate being alone," she cried. "They left me and didn't come back. Not one of them. I loved them all so much."

"The Cullen's," I asked, already knowing the answer. "You knew the Cullen's?"

"Yes," she sniffed. "And, when I saw you, I knew you could help me. I thought you would lure me away and end it all, but you weren't interested in me. Another vampire who didn't want me."

"It wasn't anything personal," I defended myself. _What the hell was I doing?_

"Edward didn't want me either," she said. "He said I didn't belong in his world and that I wasn't good enough for him."

_Well, wasn't that so Edward?_ That pompous ass gets a human to fall in love with him and then he leaves her? Why didn't Jasper tell me any of this? Oh, unless she was the human he tried to attack. Of course, now it made sense.

"Sugar," I said. "What made Edward leave?"

"Jasper," she said. "I never blamed him. I cut my finger and he lunged for me."

"And Edward decided you were better off without them?"

"He shouldn't have decided for me," she said. "I loved him and he left."

"I'm sorry, Isabella," I said. "But, none of this is my problem."

"You're not going to kill me?" she asked, almost relieved.

"You don't want me to kill you," I said. "You're a very fucked up girl, but I can't kill you." I knew now that she had a purpose. She could handle our kind, live among us. There had to be a reason for that.

She laughed at my statement, and I think she realized the truth in it.

I stood up and headed for the door.

"Wait!" she cried. "Where are you going?"

"I have to go," I said. "I'm not an animal drinker, and being around you for this length of time, knowing I won't be feeding from you is not the easiest thing for me."

"Will I see you again?" she asked.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't make it a point to hang around humans." Although, this particular human intrigued me. I had a feeling I wouldn't be staying away for very long.

"Could you try?" she said.

"You are desperate, aren't you?"

"I don't have any friends," she said. "I've been alone for three years. I never thought I would have the opportunity to be with your kind again. I feel like there's a reason that I came across you."

She was right, I felt it too, but I still had this overwhelming urge to run and never look back.

"I'll think about it," I said. "I know where to find you. Don't come looking for me."

"I won't," she said.

I took off out of the building and ran into the forest. I continued to run for miles. I knew I had no business returning to Seattle; returning to Isabella. I tried to process what was happening. How could I be so affected by one insignificant human child? Then it dawned on me; I wasn't the only vampire to come across her.

I quickly called my brother, he would answer my questions.

"Jasper," I said, as soon as he answered.

"Peter? How are you? I haven't heard from you in months."

"I've been traveling," I said.

"Did Char come back to you?"

"No," I spat. I hated thinking about her.

"Sorry, man," he said. "Where are you? Why don't we meet up?"

"Yeah, I'd like that," I said. "But, there's a reason I'm calling. I need some information."

"Sure, anything," he said.

"Why didn't you tell me that the girl you tried to attack three years ago was Edward's girl?"

There was utter silence on the other end.

"I ran into her today, and she knew what I was," I said.

"Bella?" he whispered.

_Bella? _

"You found Bella?" He asked incredulously.

"Well, actually, she found me," I said. "I'm in Seattle and she approached me and told me that she knew I was a vampire."

"Leave Seattle," Jasper said.

"Why? Will she expose me?" I asked.

"Three years ago, she wouldn't have," he said. "But, now that we've left her and never looked back, I don't know if she'd be out for revenge."

"It wasn't revenge she was looking for," I said. "She wanted me to drain her."

"What?" he yelled. "God, Peter, you didn't, did you?"

"Hell no," I said. "It all seemed entirely too easy."

"Just stay away from her," he said. "Alice tries to get a read on her occasionally, but we promised Edward we wouldn't interfere in her life."

"I didn't promise that," I said.

"Peter," he said. "She's not worth the risk."

"There's something different about her," I said. "I can't put my finger on it, but I need to know what it is about her that brought me to her."

"I know I can't talk you out of this," he said. "But, please don't hurt her. The Cullen's," he stopped and thought for a second. "Well, they still love and miss her."

"I'll keep that in mind," I said. "I'll be in touch."

I hung up and continued with my run. I needed to think long and hard about what to do with my little human groupie. My best course of action was to keep running in the opposite direction, but I never did what was best. I had a nagging suspicion that I was supposed to go back to her.

I gave myself a few days before heading back. After much consideration, I knew that there was a reason I needed to be around her. If I ended up draining her, then so be it. The whole damn situation was far too enticing to ignore.

It was late, but I knew she was still awake. I slipped into her apartment undetected by her, and headed to her bedroom. I pushed the door open and saw her standing with her back to me. She was changing into a t-shirt, probably her sleep attire. I caught a glimpse of her creamy bare back as she slipped the shirt over her head, and the tight little excuse for shorts that hugged her ass did not escape my gaze. I was tempted, but not by her blood. I adjusted my cock before I spoke.

"Maybe you are my type, Bella," I said, as I stepped toward her.

"Peter!" she whipped around and stared at me. She was clearly startled by my unexpected presence.

"Hello, sugar," I smirked. "Miss me?"

"You came back," she said. "I didn't think you would."

"So, Bella," I said. "What is it that you want from me?"

"Isabella," she corrected me. "I want you to call me Isabella."

"That's not what Jasper calls you," I said.

"You spoke to Jasper?" Her eyes widened. "How is he? How are all of them?"

She was eager to hear about the Cullens, of that I was certain. "They're fine," I said. "Jasper said that Alice gets visions of you sometimes."

"Where are they? Why don't they contact me?" I saw the hurt wash across her face.

"They're doing what Edward has requested of them," I said. "He has asked them not to interfere in your life."

"And they listened?" she asked. "I don't understand." She sat on the edge of the bed. "I've been waiting for someone to contact me, but they never do, and then when I saw you, I thought …" she stopped.

"You thought that maybe I could lead you to them?"

"No," she said. "I thought you could…"

_Of course… _

"Turn you?" I said. "You thought if I turned you, he would want you."

She didn't say anything.

"But, then when you lured me back here, you lost your nerve and decided that it was easier for me to just end things for you."

She nodded.

"I knew you were fucked up," I said.

"That's not very nice," she said.

"What am I supposed to think, Isabella?" I spat. "You want to kill yourself over Edward Fucking Cullen? Are you out of your mind?"

"Maybe," she said quietly.

I sat on the bed next to her and tilted her chin so that she could look at me. "He's not worth your life," I said. "No man is."

"Like you care," she said.

"Yes," I sighed. "For some fucking reason, beyond my control, I seem to care. It boggles my mind."

"Why did you come back?" she asked. "If not to kill me, then why?"

"I don't know," I said. "There is something about you that has taken hold of me. I tried to run in the opposite direction, but it didn't work. I'm not sure I won't end up killing you."

"Now what are we going to do?" she asked.

"Monopoly?" I laughed.

She smiled, and that was something she rarely did.

"Listen, Bel," I stopped, and corrected myself. "Isabella, I'm not like the Cullen's. I don't have the control Edward has. Hell, I don't even have the control Jasper has, so I can't promise that I'll even be able to be around you. You'll be in constant danger."

"I don't care," she said.

"You don't care?" I shook my head.

"I know, I'm fucked up," she smiled.

"Yup, sugar," I said. "So, we'll be fucked up together. A vampire and a human companion. Of all the ridiculous notions."

Her eyes seemed heavy as she suppressed a yawn.

"Maybe you should sleep?" I suggested.

"Will you stay?"

"Here?" I asked.

"Is my blood too overwhelming?"

"Oh," I said. "It's not just your blood, but maybe if I sit over there," I pointed to the chair across the room. "I'll be okay."

"Okay," she said. "I'll understand if you have to leave."

I nodded as she crawled into bed.

"I have an early class tomorrow," she said. "But, maybe after that we could talk? Get to know one another?"

"If that's what humans do," I said, at a loss over what we were supposed to do. I never got acquainted with my food source and up until now, that was the only use I had for her kind.

"Good night," she said.

"Night, sugar," I said, as I sat in the chair and propped my feet up on the bed. It was going to be a long night. If I could ignore my burning throat, her unique scent and the fact that I couldn't stop thinking about her cute little ass, I might be okay. _Oh, fuck, who was I kidding?_

Actually, that first night wasn't so bad. She was an extremely restless sleeper, to say the least. It took her hours to fall asleep, and when she did, there was nothing peaceful about it. She tossed and turned and kicked the covers off constantly. With each passing night, I found myself moving closer and closer to the bed. By the fourth night, I was able to get close enough to pull the covers back up over her body. And now, here it was two weeks later and she was asking me to sit on the bed with her while she slept.

"Isabella," I said. "It's probably not such a good idea that I be that close to your throat."

"You don't give yourself enough credit," she smiled. "You've been spending every night with me for two weeks, and you've never tried to attack me."

"Doesn't mean I didn't want to," I reminded her.

She continued to stare at me as she bit her lip. As sexy as I thought that little quirk was, I constantly found myself hoping that she didn't bite too hard and draw blood. I knew I wouldn't be able to resist that.

"I wish I knew what was going on in that little brain of yours," I said.

She smiled at me and that made my insides flip. That was happening a lot lately.

"What's so amusing?" I asked.

"Not even Edward could tell you what was in my head," she said.

"What?" I asked. "Are you telling me that Edward couldn't read your mind?" That captivated me because, as far as I knew, he could read everyone. There was something unique about her.

"My mind was silent to him," she said. "There's probably something wrong with me."

"No," I said, as I walked over to the bed and sat down next to her. "You must be a shield."

"A what?"

"A shield," I said. "Your mind has the power to block out certain gifts. I bet you wouldn't even be able to feel the pain that Jane could inflict. Although, I wouldn't be willing to test that theory."

"Who is Jane?" she asked.

"A powerful member of the Volturi Guard," I said. "But, what else can you do?" The thought appealed to me. How powerful would she be?

"I don't understand?" she said. "How come you know this about me, but the others didn't?"

"Apparently, that's my gift. I can see what others can't, but I usually can only do it when a person is turned. But, with you, it seems to come a little more naturally."

"Really?"

"You asked why I didn't pick you that first night," I said. "I knew there was something different about you, but I couldn't put my finger on it." I reached out and pushed a stray hair from her face.

She pulled back.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't realize that I couldn't touch you."

"No," she said. "It's just that you never do."

"Do you want me to?"

"Sometimes," she smiled, as the blush ran across her cheeks. "Don't you crave contact?"

"Not usually," I said.

"Oh," she continued to look anywhere but in my eyes.

"Look at me," I said.

She slowly allowed her eyes to connect with mine.

"I'd like to try something tonight," I said. "I don't know if I'll be able to, but I've fed earlier today, so I'm not thirsty."

"What do you want to try?"

"I'd like to hold you while you sleep," I said. I wasn't sure why, but I was yearning to be closer to her, and I thought it might be less awkward while she was asleep.

She crawled up to the top of the bed and nodded.

I slowly moved toward her and then leaned against the headboard. I extended my arm, but she hesitated. "Are you afraid of me?"

"No," she smiled.

I reached for her arm and abruptly pulled her into my chest.

She gasped.

"I'm not a very patient man," I said. "I'm used to getting what I want."

"So I see," she said, as she rested her head against my chest.

I glanced down at her and she seemed rather comfortable in my arms. Her tiny body was a perfect fit against mine. It only took her a few minutes to get over the awkwardness, and then she relaxed against me.

"How is the hunting going?"

"Hmm," I said. "Well, I'm no longer hanging out at the pub." I decided if I was going to stick around here longer, I needed a new strategy when it came to hunting. It wasn't the best way, but I started hunting drifters and homeless people. Plus, I had no desire to touch another human girl. I knew which one I wanted to be close to, and the thought of being near another repulsed me.

"Peter," she said, her voice fading into sleep. "Thanks for staying."

She drifted off to sleep, and even as complete darkness fell over the room, I could still see her. I studied her features, took in her scent. There wasn't anything that I didn't know about Isabella Swan. I had traveled back to Forks to learn about her father, I walked the halls of her old high school; I went back to the Cullen house and sat in Edward's room. I was trying to figure out who she was, what she wanted, but it escaped me. At times, it only seemed that all she wanted was me. I knew I felt that way. I wanted to be around her constantly, but why would she feel that way for me? What could she possibly think I had to offer her?

In the next few weeks, I had done things that I never would have considered doing before. I went to the movies and saw a chick flick, it was sappy and far-fetched, but Isabella enjoyed it. I took her for Chinese food, I sat in the restaurant and pretended to eat, and we frequented a few museums. I realized that whatever we attempted, we laughed, and always had a really good time. I genuinely liked being with her, and the worst part of that day was when she was at school. I hated being away from her.

I waited patiently in her apartment for her to get home. I had taken a walk to the campus earlier in the day to say hello, but when I got there, I saw her eating lunch with a man, well, compared to me, a boy, but still. They were laughing and going over what appeared to be class notes. I didn't like it, but the rain had stopped and the sun was trying to make an appearance, so I was banished to the apartment, left to wait for her to come back.

I heard her climbing the steps to her apartment. She put the key in the lock and entered. I was standing behind the door, so when she came in, she didn't realize I was even there. She really was unobservant.

I reached for her arm and pulled her to me. She let out a small scream, before realizing it was me.

"God," she laughed. "You scared me."

"Weren't expecting me?" I was glad she was alone.

"You're usually not here until later," she smiled. "But, I'm glad you are."

"Are you?" I knew I was being intentionally confrontational, but seeing her with him unleashed something dark and possessive.

"I'm always happy to see you," she leaned in and kissed my cheek. That was something she didn't do often, but every time she did, I found myself wanting to reciprocate. "You should know that by now."

"I should know a lot of things, Isabella," I said. "But, I'm still curious."

"About what?"

"Who you were having lunch with today," I said.

"In the student center? You were there?"

"I'm never far," I informed her.

"I was eating alone when a boy from my chemistry class sat down to look at my notes," she explained. "Why didn't you come over?"

"Because your chemistry friend might not have liked it," I said.

"I don't think he would have cared," she said.

"And, if I did come over, how would you have introduced me?" _Why was I being so insecure?_

"How would you have wanted me to introduce you, Peter?" She sounded slightly annoyed.

"What do you want from me?" I had never played these human games before. I was out of my league.

"What do I want from you?" she huffed, as she paced the room. "For a vampire who claims to be able to see things others can't, you're not doing a very good job with me."

"What the fuck does that mean?" I asked.

"For weeks I've been trying to get you to touch me, or give me some indication that you might be interested in me. I can't make the first move, because I don't want to surprise you and cause you to lose control."

"You want me to touch you?" I was in shock. I had no idea that she could feel that way about me.

"I invited you into my bed, I held your hand at the movies, I kiss your cheek whenever I think you'll be okay with it," she said. "I've done everything but…"

"Let me know," I said. "Why didn't you just tell me what you wanted?"

"Because I didn't think that you could be interested in someone as ordinary as me," she said as she looked down. "I'm not what you're used to, and I was afraid you would reject me."

_Man, was I an idiot?_

I crossed the room and stood in front of her in an instant. "Are you absurd? How could I not want you? I have been waiting for weeks to do this." I pulled her toward me and pressed my cold, hard lips against her warm, sexy mouth. I had waited so long to taste her this way. She melted into my arms and sighed against my mouth.

Finally, I could have her. I lifted her up and sat her on the counter. She wrapped her legs around my hips, pulling me closer to her. It was happening so fast, we were both so urgent. This was what I was used to, so it didn't strike me as odd. I never considered taking it slow.

I ripped her shirt open, causing buttons to fly across the room and hit the floor. I paused briefly to stare at her lace-covered breasts. They were more beautiful than I could have imagined. I leaned forward and swirled my tongue over her very aroused nipple. She shivered at my cool breath as she twisted her fingers in my hair and pulled me closer to her, arching her back to offer me more.

I gripped her hips and thrust her center against my aching cock. She winced at the pressure my fingers were applying on her fragile hips. I let up a bit, mentally reminding myself that I could break her, if I wasn't careful. I rubbed against her for a few more seconds, but that friction wasn't enough. The scent of her arousal was making me crazy as I growled against her neck. I had to see all of her.

I reached down between us and pulled at the button on her jeans, quickly lowering the zipper.

"I have to have you," I said, as I started to free her from the confines of her pants. She placed her hands against my chest, creating a bit of distance.

"I want you, but there will be blood," she whispered. "Can you handle that?"

_What? _I was too caught up in her to understand what she was trying to tell me. I pressed my lips to hers, as her unsteady hands reached for the buttons of my shirt. She started to shake.

I caught her hands in mine and said, "Are you okay?"

She nodded. "I've never done this before," she whispered, as she pressed her lips to mine and continued to remove my shirt.

"What do you mean you've never done this before?"I asked_. She couldn't possibly be, could she_?

She continued to claw at my chest and push herself into me. "He wouldn't touch me," she moaned. "He was afraid to hurt me."

Our whole relationship started to flash before me. She sought me out, approached me, wanted me to turn her, end her life, asked me about the Cullen's, she wanted me to hold her while she slept. She asked me to stay_. Why? _And now, she was offering herself to me, knowing that I might not be able to control myself.

"Peter," she moaned against my lips. "Please."

I let go of her and backed away. "I can't," I said.

"What? Why?" she asked.

"I can't be his substitute," I said. "I won't be."

"Who?"

"Edward, that's who," I said. "I know what you're doing, you've been doing it since the first day you saw me."

"No," she said, as she hopped off the counter and walked toward me. "You're wrong. It's you that I want."

I wanted to believe her, but it didn't make sense. Why would she want someone like me? I wasn't good. I was a killer and didn't deserve her.

"Peter, please," she said. "It's you that I want."

"I won't be your revenge against Edward Cullen," I said. "He didn't want you and now you think that you could show him by being with me."

"I don't even know where he is," she said. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because this is who I am, sugar," I hissed. "Can you see me clearly now?"

"You jerk," she cried. "I trusted you. I let you in."

"That was your choice," I said. "I didn't ask for you."

"Sometimes we don't ask," she said. "It just happens." She was so right, and I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and tell her how I really felt. I wanted to tell her how much I needed her, but I just couldn't trust myself with this innocent girl. I was no better than Edward.

"I can't," I said, as I turned and walked to the door. "I'm sorry Isabella, but…"

She let out a huge sob and then quickly covered her mouth with her hand.

"I'm sorry," I said, as I headed out the door.

"Peter!" she screamed, but I kept going. She was better off.

I took off for the forest. It was time for me to leave Seattle and never look back. I knew that she would be embedded in my mind forever, but I was doing her a favor. What kind of life could I offer her? I was a nomad who drank from humans. I didn't have a desire to settle down, and I could never be normal or human for her.

My phone began to vibrate and for the first time in my existence, I was afraid. A fragile, human scared me. I looked at the display screen and breathed an unnecessary sigh of relief.

"Jasper," I said.

"Alice wanted me to tell you what a colossal ass you are," he sighed.

"What did she see?" I asked, almost not wanting to know.

"She's been having visions of you and Bella for weeks," he said. "But, I didn't want to interfere because I knew you had to figure it out for yourself."

"She saw that I left her tonight," I said, feeling extremely ashamed of myself.

"Why did you do that?" Jasper asked.

"I panicked," I said. "She's falling in love with me and that can't happen."

"It's too late," he said. "And, you're already in love with her."

"You can't feel that over the phone," I said. "Can you?"

He laughed. "I'm a pretty powerful empath, but my wife sees things."

"What kind of things?" I asked.

"I've already interfered enough," he said. "Go back and figure it out."

"Don't you think she's better off without me?" I sighed.

"Are you Edward now?" he asked.

"I'm going back now," I said. "But, you'd tell me if this wasn't the right thing to do?"

"Yes, Peter, I would," he said. "But, you need her as much as she needs you."

I hung up and ran back to her apartment. I had a lot of explaining to do. She was giving herself to me in the most intimate way, and I did exactly what she feared the most; I abandoned her. She trusted me and I threw it back in her face, all because I was a coward.

I slipped back into her house, but all the lights were off. She had gone to bed, but she wasn't sleeping. I walked back to her room and saw that she was curled up in the bed, with her back to the door. I moved behind her and wrapped my arms around her.

"I'm sorry," I whispered into her hair.

"Why did you come back?" she asked, as she rolled over and looked at me. I could tell she had been crying and I hated myself for being the cause of her pain. "You think you can just treat me that way, say those things to me, and then apologize and it's all better?"

"No," I said. "I was wrong. I know you weren't using me as a substitute for Edward. You were giving me something very precious and I panicked."

"Why? If you didn't want me, why did you kiss me?"

"Didn't want you?" I laughed at the absurdity of that statement. "I want you more than I've ever wanted another, but I don't know if making love will be enough."

"I don't," I pressed my fingers against her lips.

"I've taken many humans," I said. "You know that. It was part of my hunting ritual. Sex for a vampire is very primal. It's a baser need. We claim what we want and then we finish the job."

"You'll want to bite me after we have sex?"

"I don't know," I admitted. "Any other time I took a human, I drained them immediately after. Is that someone you really want to be with? How could you give yourself to me? I'm not worthy of you, Isabella. Why can't you understand that?"

"It wasn't your fault," she said. "You were doing what came naturally for you. I don't blame you." She stroked my cheek and then pressed her palm to my face. "Peter," she whispered. "I want to be with you. When you touch me, it's only you I think about. It's your hands I want on my body, your lips against mine. I want to feel connected to you. I trust that you can do this."

"I've never made love to a human before," I said. "I've fucked many, but you would be the first, Isabella. My heart tells me that I can do this without wanting your blood, but I'm afraid to trust that."

"I trust you," she said, as she pressed her lips to mine, trying to reassure me. "I want to be with you."

I kissed her back as gently as I could. I ignored the burning in my throat, because I knew the benefits of this encounter would far outweigh any discomfort I was feeling. She reached for the buttons of my shirt and quickly undid them, but before she could get it off my shoulders I grabbed her hands.

"Are you sure?" I asked. "It took so much restraint for me to stop earlier, and I'm not sure I can do that again."

"You won't have to stop," she smiled. "Can't you feel how right this is?"

I let go of her hands and slowly reached down to the bottom of her shirt, lifting it slightly to reveal her stomach. I stared into her eyes as I ran my hands over her ribs and down to her hip. I wanted to touch every inch of her.

"I feel it, Isabella," I said, as I propped myself up and hovered over her, lowering my lips to her neck. "I felt it from the very beginning." I dragged my lips down to her magnificent breasts, kissing them through her thin tank top. The shirt had to go. I pulled it over her head, revealing her bare chest to me. She tried to cover herself, but I caught her hands in mine.

"Don't hide from me." I said. "You're beautiful." I started placing open-mouth kisses down the valley of her breasts, cupping one in my hand while I teased the other nipple with my tongue.

"Ahh," she moaned, as she arched her back. I continued to please her with my mouth, as she managed to free me from my shirt. The scent of her arousal mixed with those little "fuck me" moans she was making were going to be the death of me. I stood up on my knees, placing my hands on either side of her hips.

"I need to see all of you." I had her shorts and panties off before she could even respond. I spread her legs and took in her entire body. She was spectacular, and I knew in that moment that I had to make her mine. She was just as eager as I was.

"Peter, please," she whispered. "I need you to touch me; take me."

I slid my hands up her thighs, lowering my lips to her stomach, and working my way down. I had to taste her before I could focus on anything else. She tightened her legs when she realized where I was headed. I smiled against her mound when I remembered just how pure she was. Everything would be so new for her, and I got even more aroused thinking about all of things I could teach her. Tonight, I would take it slow.

I moved an inch lower, to her inner thigh and licked the juices that had dripped there, and then I tenderly sucked on her soft skin, leaving behind a small red mark. She tasted incredibly sweet, just as I knew she would. I stood up and unbuckled my belt as she got up on her knees to face me. She pressed her mouth to mine as her tiny, unsteady hands reached between us and unbuttoned my jeans. I tangled my fingers in her long mane and pulled her closer to my lips, allowing my tongue to thrust deep into her mouth. She fumbled with my zipper, but eventually lowered it and got my pants down over my hips. I helped her with the rest and then stood completely naked in front of her, as she raked her eyes over my body and smiled.

"Like what you see?" I smirked.

She nodded and judging from her cheeks, I could tell she was embarrassed.

I lowered her to the bed and gently placed myself on top of her. She was so warm against my cool skin, and I knew I couldn't wait much longer.

"I'll be as gentle as possible," I whispered. "But, I can't promise that you won't feel some amount of pain. I'm sorry."

She wrapped her arms around my neck and hitched her leg over my hip. "I'm ready," she smiled.

I pushed two fingers inside her and started to slide in and out of her. She was so wet and aroused that I knew this would be the best time to enter her. I removed my fingers and grabbed my cock, placing it at her moist slit. I rubbed the tip of my head against her and felt my pre-cum transfer onto her; she shivered. I continued to move against her, trying to figure out the best way to go about this when suddenly she moved her hips, causing me to push deeper into her.

"Eager, sugar?"

"Yes," she moaned, as she wrapped her other leg around my back.

I grabbed her hips and quickly thrust into her with vampire speed, breaking her thin barrier as fast as I could. I stilled my movement, allowing her to adjust to my size, and giving me a moment to recover from the warm rush of blood that was dripping on to me.

I knew we were both on the same page, when we simultaneously asked, "Are you okay?"

We laughed at one another.

"I'm perfect," I said. "But, I'll stop if the pain is too much for you."

"No," she said. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

I resumed my movement and after a while she began to move with me. I looked down at her and couldn't help but think how beautiful she was, caught up in the pleasure I was bringing her. Her eyes were closed, lips slightly parted, and there was a thin sheen of sweat covering her body. The scent of her arousal was filling the air and bringing me close to my own release.

"You're so warm and tight," I said. "I've never felt anything so amazing. I don't ever want to stop."

I lowered my mouth to her nipple, capturing it between my teeth as I picked up my pace. I continued to suck and swirl and just as I moved to her other nipple, I felt her muscles begin to tighten; first in her abdomen and then around my cock.

"Oh," she screamed. "Peter, I think I'm …oh, that feels good."

"Let go, my sweet girl," I said, as I felt my own release taking over. "Cum for me."

And, just as she screamed out my name, I shot my cool stream in long, endless spurts. I didn't think I ever came like that before, but I prayed that she would bring me to that level of intensity every time we were together.

I rolled off her and pulled her onto my chest. I waited for her to catch her breath before speaking. I stroked her back for a few minutes, trying to come down from my own pleasure.

"Is everything okay?" she whispered. "Is my blood too much?"

"No," I laughed. "The funny thing is, it's not your blood I want."

"What is it?" she asked, clearly confused.

"I want you again," I said, as I kissed her head. "But, you're human and you need some recovery time."

"It was good then?"

"It was much better than good, sugar," I said. "You'll have to trust me."

"With my life," she said, and I knew she was telling the truth.

"I don't know what kind of life I can offer you," I said. "I can't change who I am. I'll never be an animal drinker and I can't provide you with a coven."

"I understand who you are," she said. "I'm not looking for a Cullen."

"So what?" I said. "You'll roam the world with me?"

"I'll go anywhere with you," she said, as she hugged me tighter.

"Hmm, a vampire and his human companion," I thought about that for a few seconds. "I guess it could work."

"I don't plan on being human forever," she said.

"You know what, sugar?" I said. "I don't plan on keeping you human forever."


End file.
